Poison & Wine
by xal0nenowx
Summary: A Brittana/Faberry fic that takes place AFTER 'Sexy'. Doesn't follow the show 100%, but it's pretty close. Please don't hate it! Rated T for now, potentially could move to M later on.
1. Chapter 1

**Not my first fic, just my first Brittana fic :) I started writing this right after SEXY, but I got distracted. It doesn't follow the show EXACTLY, but it's relatively close. Please be gentle!**

Poison & Wine

There was just something about the way the redness of the straining capillaries brought out the depth of color in those blue eyes. The green starburst around the pupil could stop you clear in your tracks. Eyes that rarely produced tears outside the confines of that mint green bedroom. Yet here they were, damp with the tears she'd been lucky enough to contain until she reached the unlit choir room. Sitting in her usual chair, Brittany placed her head in her hands and let the tears fall. 

* * *

><p>Santana walked down the hall towards her locker, her usual "kiss my ass" attitude nowhere to be found. The students still cleared the way for her to pass, not wanting to endure her wrath. With her head down, she reached the aluminum door and numbly spun the tiny wheel to three numbers until the lock popped free. She gathered her books and avoided her reflection in the small mirror magnetized to the inside. Before she could close the door, she felt the familiar charge she knew so well. It used to energize her, like a jolt of static electricity that caused every hair to stand on end and a warmth to flutter inside her chest. Now the adrenaline rush has been replaced by anxiety. The once comforting and addictive feeling she craved felt more like taking a sip of milk from the carton and realizing as it hits your tongue that it has expired days before. She wanted to run, but she'd avoided the blonde like the plague since Regionals.<p>

Spring Break made it easier, not having to spend each day in class beside her. But now the sanctuary of a week alone in her room was gone. Back to the real world, and this real world sucked balls.

"Hey" The softness of Brittany's voice never failed to slip right through the tiniest crack in Santana's internal wall.

The brown eyed girl took in a shaky breath behind her locker door, "Hi." she replied, intending to sound stoic. She failed.

"How was your break?" Brittany asked, trying to catch her eye.

"I stayed pretty busy." Lies. All lies. She'd spent the entire week locked in her room, laying in bed watching reruns of BUFFY on LOGO, marathons on Bravo, and an hour long shower every day so she could release the tears that she wouldn't dare show her parents. This was the first year she'd not gone up to Lake Erie with the Pierce family. Her usual sun-kissed glow nowhere in sight. Instead, a pale, slightly gaunt, obviously drained Santana stood, her hair up in a pony tail, wearing a pair of ripped jeans, a striped v-neck sweater and a pair of chucks.

"We missed you at the lake… _I _missed you." the blonde spoke honestly.

"I had some family stuff to be around for. No big." She finally turned towards the taller girl. The dark circles under the dark brown eyes actually made them appear lighter. Brittany loved to stare into Santana's eyes. When she was angry, they were dark as night. When she was happy, they'd sparkle and the dark mahogany hue looked like the richest cups of coffee you'd ever see. Today, the red didn't shine. They were flat, like a dried up brown marker.

Brittany's face fell when she took in the brunette's appearance. She'd known the girl since First grade and had only ever seen her this way one other time: When her brother left for Iraq in 2003. They didn't talk about Spencer Lopez often. He hadn't been killed, but his experience had affected him greatly. He came back to Lima in 2007 but he extended his tour and had been assigned to Afghanistan. He wanted to stay and help. He was Santana's hero, but she didn't talk about him. It hurt too much. Brittany's heart dropped and she reached to grasp the Latina's hand like she'd done hundreds of times before. This time was different. This time, Santana's hand recoiled like she'd been burned.

The taller girl, who embodied innocence in nearly every sense of the word, looked as if she'd just found out Santa wasn't real. "San-"

"Hey Britt," The sound of wheels on the linoleum caused the dark brown pools to finally meet cobalt blue. Both girls exhaled what sounded like the last bit of oxygen that occupied their lungs. The ashy brown haired boy wheeled his way towards his girlfriend and her best friend, unaware of the moment he'd interrupted.

"I gotta go." Santana turned as Artie reached them, taking Brittany's hand in his own. Brittany looked down at her hand clasped with Artie's and a small smile formed at the corner of her mouth.

"What up, Sapphic Santana?" The words barely registered before the icy cold wave hit her. The sound of the slushy hitting the floor caused a wave of silence across the hall. The only sound was Karofsky's laughter as he turned the corner. "Why don't you get your girlfriend to clean you up?" with that, he was gone.

The brunette stood in shock as the sticky red substance caused her clothes to cling to her skin. She opened her eyes and was met with an emerald pair, gazing at her with an overwhelming sense of empathy. She, too, knew the sting of a slushie facial. No one deserved that. Not even Santana Lopez. Quinn released Finn's hand and started to step towards her when Brittany placed a hand on the Latina's shoulder.

"Don't." Santana snapped, pulling away from the touch like the blonde's hand was dripping with acid.

"Santana, pl-" Brittany pleaded.

"I said don't!" and she stepped back, shooting the blonde a look she'd never seen. A look of betrayal, anger, and agony. Just then, she felt a tender hand comfortingly placed at the small of her back.

"I got you." Quinn said softly, and led the sticky former cheerleader to the locker room.

Artie rolled up beside his girlfriend, "What was that about?" He asked gently as Finn joined them in the middle of the hall, the whispers from the other students growing as they made their way to their classes.

"I don't… I gotta go." Brittany said somberly and walked away, the sting of tears forming behind her eyes.

* * *

><p>She didn't protest. She didn't flinch. She simply let the green eyed blonde carefully remove the remains of the red slush from her face and hair as they sat on the bench in the girls locker room. "One of these days, I swear Karofsky is gonna get it."<p>

"Doesn't matter." Santana said softly.

"Like hell it doesn't matter." Quinn put down the damp towel and handed her a fresh one to dry herself with.

"It's not a big deal."

Quinn had never heard the fiery Latina so defeated. The blonde placed a kind hand on a damp denim knee, "Talk to me, Lopez." She was met with silence, so she was sure to tread lightly. "I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess this has something to do with what went down before regionals." Santana's eyes shot up.

"What are you talking about?" She feigned ignorance.

"The duet in Glee a couple weeks ago… The thing at your locker…"

"What thing?"

"I saw, Santana. You don't cry often so when it happens it's hard not to notice. Something major went down and you were clearly upset about it. I know I'm not your favorite person, but believe it or not you CAN talk to me." Quinn spoke gently, but securely.

Santana waited for the surge of fire to spark in her so she could tell off the former cheerleader and get on with her day, but she just didn't have the strength to fight anymore. She bit her lip and her normally smooth brow contorted with sorrow. The tears flew freely and she lowered her head to the shoulder of her childhood friend. "I told her I loved her." she choked out between sobs.

Quinn closed her eyes and the realization of what she'd seen finally came together. Her arms tightened around the brown eyed girl and she nodded softly, "she didn't say it back?"

Santana pulled back slightly and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her sweater. "She did." she responded hoarsely. "But she said she couldn't be with me because it wasn't fair to Artie."

Quinn reached up and wiped the tears from her friend's face. "Brittany's a good person. She couldn't intentionally hurt someone if she tried, you know that."

"Yeah? Well. This fucking hurts."

"I know it does. But you can't think that she's doing this to hurt you. I'm sure she's just as torn as you are." Quinn tried to reason with her.

"Oh yeah. She looks real torn." Santana spat back, pulling out of the blonde's embrace. Quinn didn't want to push, so she walked to the large red locker and pulled out some clean warm up clothes. Red track pants, a McKinley High P.E. shirt and a white track jacket. She handed them to the brunette.

In the midst of the internal pain, Santana forgot the new scars that had formed externally as she removed her long sleeved sweater. Quinn's gasp brought her back and she grabbed the clothes from her hands, but not before the blonde's slender fingers grasped around her forearm. "Oh Honey" Quinn breathed as her eyes examined the shallow, vertical scabs about two inches long up both of the Latina's wrists.

"Don't. It's nothing." Santana tried to pull free but Quinn did not release her.

"Santana Maria Lopez, What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was trying NOT to think, Teen Mom." Santana spat, finally breaking free of the blonde's grasp and putting the t-shirt on.

"Those aren't attention cuts. You did it the right way." she said softly. Santana's eyes met Quinn's for a moment before she continued changing into the track pants and jacket. She didn't say a word.

* * *

><p>The bell rang, but the blonde didn't move. She pulled her knees up to her chest and lowered her head, the tears soaking into the cotton of her tights. It was Monday morning. Glee wasn't until Tuesday afternoon. She may not have been the sharpest crayon, but Brittany was certain she could be alone in the familiar room. Tears fell silently at first. Then the memories started to invade her mind. Locking pinkies, dancing, tender looks, gentle touches, the way they just knew each other completely. It wasn't even about the sex, which was perfect in Brittany's mind. It was about her heart. Santana WAS her heart. She was the reason she got ready in the morning. The last text she sent at night. The first person she looked for. The first person she told. The one she dreamed about. Even after she'd started dating Artie, she still thought about Santana. She assumed it wasn't out of the ordinary since when Santana was with Puck, but she'd still call Brittany to hook up whenever she was bored. They were always perfectly in sync. Yes, things changed when Puck started dating Lauren and Santana went to Sam, but they were still best friends. Brittany had Artie. Sexy time belonged with him now. She didn't realize how much she missed her friend in more than just a friendly way until the party at Rachel's house. The blonde swallowed a sob and remembered that night.<p>

The music was loud, the alcohol flowed freely after Puck broke into the liquor cabinet. Santana had the bottle of Tequila and suggested body shots. Nothing new. But the moment the Latina's tongue met the salt on the blonde's stomach- she felt her heart flutter. They locked eyes as she placed the lime in her mouth, and Brittany wanted her right then. But there were so many people around, and sexy time with Santana was only for when they were locked in a room alone. The blonde rolled off of the table and straight into Artie's lap, placing a much needed kiss on his lips. Artie smiled. Santana took another shot straight from the bottle. Blue met Brown for a moment before Santana turned away and started fighting with Sam.

"_Please say you love me back. Please._" Santana's words echoed in Brittany's ears and she felt her heart constrict. She did love her. More than anything. But she also loved Artie, and he'd never done anything to hurt her. He was a good guy. She knew that much, and she knew she couldn't hurt him. The look on Santana's face when she pulled away from Brittany's touch in the hallway flashed in front of her eyes, and a new wave of sobs racked her slender frame.

"How's Santana?" Finn said as he placed some books back in his locker.

"She's crushed. I've never seen her like this." Quinn said softly, leaning against the aluminum and gazing at the half open Choir Room door beside her. She didn't think anything of it, figuring Rachel had run in there to play the piano or discuss her solo's with Mr. Schue and simply forgotten to close the door before leaving.

"I can't believe Karofsky slushied her. I never thought that would happen." the Frankenteen shook his head.

"She's hurting so bad, Finn." the blonde closed her eyes, unaware that the blue eyed blonde that had been wrestling with her own inner demons was now eavesdropping behind the half open door.

"Are you gonna talk to Mrs. Pillsbury?"

"And tell her what, that Santana tried to kill herself? It's not my place and Santana would probably kill me first if I told anyone. Obviously YOU can't say a word." Quinn poked her index finger into Finn's chest as he nodded in agreement and they walked towards their next class.

The tall blonde felt her knees give out from under her and she slid down the wall. The breath knocked right out of her chest. The agony she felt in that moment was more than she'd ever felt. Brittany had been hurt before. Injuries from dance, getting dropped from the top of the pyramid during cheerio's practice, etc. But she'd never hurt like this. She just didn't understand how things got so messed up and she had no idea how to fix it. She shook her head as Quinn's words echoed in her head. "_What, that Santana tried to kill herself? Santana…Kill herself… Kill herself…_" The sobs started again and Brittany whispered her best friend's name. She had to leave. She couldn't stay in that dark room anymore. She wiped her swollen, bloodshot eyes and opened the choir room door. She looked down one side of the hall as she stepped out, not noticing the dark haired girl coming up on her other side. They both raised their heads at the same time, causing a minor collision. They met each other's broken eyes and Brittany whispered "I'm so sorry" before running down the hall, disappearing around the corner. Santana stood there in shock, having rarely seen Brittany cry before. The blueness in her eyes so striking, she couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. She watched the girl that had broken her heart disappear as fast as she'd appeared, and Santana stepped inside the empty choir room. Closing the door, she leaned against the same spot on the wall and slid down, mirroring Brittany's position from moments before. The tears started again.

Around the corner, Brittany sat on the cold, linoleum floor. Her back against a locker. The tears falling without reservation.


	2. Chapter 2

**2**

Santana opened the door to her house, tossing her keys on the foyer table and running upstairs to her room. Her parents both worked late so there was no need to exchange pleasantries. She threw open the bedroom door, slamming it behind her and causing a tremor in those black walls. The comfort of the bed was just steps away, yet it felt like a marathon. It took every ounce of energy to remove the vinyl track jacket, kick off her chucks, and fall into the sanctuary of Egyptian cotton. Her eye muscles echoed the beat of her heart, pulsing with every breath. The sting of tears she'd contained since she left the choir room reminded her that she was finally alone and she could expel them without consequence.

The soft buzz of her cell phone broke her from the cryfest and she reached into her pocket to retrieve it.

"you hanging in there?" Four words from a friend and the tears subsided momentarily.

"Oh yeah, you know me." The Latina replied.

"Could you use some company?" It was rare that Quinn visited the Lopez house without cheerio practice as an excuse. Any other day, Santana would have blown her off. Not today.

"That'd actually be-" backspace. "I'm fine, Pregs-" nope… "Sure." she finally settled on the one word reply and tossed her phone down beside her. It was mere seconds before the doorbell rang. The brown eyed girl rolled her tired eyes and placed her feet on the hardwood floor. She sauntered down the stairs and swung open the front door.

"What would you have done if i'd said 'No'?" she asked.

"Spare key under the mailbox." The emerald eyes sparkled kindly.

The corner of Santana's mouth curled up slightly as she waved the girl inside and towards the kitchen.

"How're ya feeling?" Quinn asked as she sat at the barstool.

"You don't have to treat me like glass, Quinn. I'm not gonna break." her reply didn't contain the bite they were used to. It took the blonde a moment to respond.

"It's ok to break, San." she whispered, placing her hand on top of the brunettes.

They at in silence for a few minutes before Santana cleared her throat. "So, did I miss anything?"

"Not a thing." she lied. She didn't have the heart to tell the Latina that the girl responsible for the ache in her chest was having a hard time holding it together herself.

* * *

><p>It may have been the middle of April, but there was still a chill in the air. Brittany pulled up the collar on her coat and dug her hands deeper into her pockets as a soft breeze whirled around her. Her hands were gloveless, something she'd never noticed before since her walk home was usually accompanied by her feisty cohort. Today, she felt the cold. A chilling reminder of how different things were now. How everything changed with just a few words. Brittany wracked her brain, trying desperately to make sense of the mess that had been made.<p>

Most days, she'd spend the walk home avoiding cracks in the sidewalk, an attempt to rid her mother of any back pain. She'd race her friend, trying to see who could step on the most crunchy leaves. She'd remove an apple from her backpack, placing on the grass so the caterpillars would have something to eat. She'd read that there was a hungry one. Today she just walked. She was so lost in her head that she nearly missed the car pulling up along side of her.

"Need a ride?" the friendly voice called out the window.

"I'm not supposed to ride with strangers." Brittany kept her eyes on the sidewalk.

"Britt, It's Finn." The boy pulled closer to the curb and stopped the car.

"Hi Finn." She spoke softly.

"You look cold." He said as he opened the door and stepped around to the sidewalk.

"Are my lips blue?" Brittany stuck her bottom lip out and looked down her nose to look for herself.

Finn couldn't help but chuckle. "A little bit. Why don't you let me drop you off?"

Brittany raised a cold hand to her mouth, finally noticing that what she thought was fog was actually her breath. "Do you have any candy?"

"Umm. I think I've got some Altoids in the glove compartment."

"I'm not supposed to get into cars with people that have candy."

Finn shook his head. "It's ok, Brittany. I don't have any candy."

She took a moment to stare at the boy before agreeing to let him drive her home. They drove in relative silence as the heater pumped warm air through truck.

"Are you excited to get back to Glee tomorrow?" Finn asked softly, trying to make conversation.

"I guess." Brittany said, looking down at her hands in her lap. A few moments of silence passed before the blonde broke it. "Did Santana really try to kill herself?" she asked in a small voice.

Finn sighed. "I don't know, Britt. I just know she was upset."

"I don't understand any of this." she spoke, confusion evident in each word.

"You love her, right?"

"Yes. But I love Artie too."

"It's tough, ya know? I know what it's like to not want to hurt the people you care about." The young man said honestly. A moment passed and they turned on to Brittany's street. He pulled up to the country home and put the car in park. Brittany made no movement to leave.

"Finn, can you love two people at the same time?" She finally raised her blue eyes to meet his.

The brown haired boy audibly exhaled. "I think you can. I don't think it's the best idea, but sometimes you can't control it, ya know? Your heart doesn't always agree with your head."

The confusion was clear on Brittany's brow and Finn tried to explain himself. "I just mean that you can't choose who you love. Maybe it's a guy, maybe it's a girl. You just need to listen to your heart."

"All it says is 'BOOM. BOOM. BOOM. BOOM'." The blonde said innocently.

Finn smiled at her sweetness and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Just listen closer. It'll tell you when it's time."

Brittany nodded and opened the car door. "Thanks Finn."

"No problem. I'll see you tomorrow." He watched her walk to her front door and step inside before he drove off. He stopped at the red light and pulled out his phone. "Just drove Britt home. She's wicked sad too." He texted his girlfriend.

"With San. Getting ready to leave." The blonde replied and closed her phone.

"Finnius sexting you?" Santana asked as she took a sip of the left over sangria from her spot on the couch.

"Just letting me know he's on his way home. I should probably head that way myself… You gonna be alright by yourself?" Quinn asked, placing her hand on the other girls knee.

"Still not breaking, Fabs." She took another sip.

The green eyed girl nodded and started to stand. Reaching out, she took the Latina's hand and held it in her own before turning it over and running her thumb tenderly across the healing scar. "Please don't do this again, Santana. Please." she pleaded with her friend.

Santana raised her eyes saw the sincerity coming form the girl before her. She nodded her head spoke softly, "I won't. I promise."

"If you need anything… at all. You know where to find me." Quinn said, motioning with her cell phone.

"I know." Before the blonde reached the front door, Santana spoke again. "Quinn?"

"Yeah?" The blonde turned back to the tired girl.

"Thank you." The words didn't roll off her tongue as easily as they did for others, but they were sincere.

"Anytime." Quinn smiled and offered a small wave before walking out the door.

Santana closed the heavy wooden door behind her and locked it before glancing at her watch. 5:18pm. She needed to wash the remnants of the day away so she made her way up to her bathroom. The hot water stung her skin, but after a few seconds it began to wash away the tension in her shoulders. She stuck her head under the steaming water and watched traces of pink circle the drain. She washed the remaining slushy out of her hair and let the water beat on her face, soothing the tired muscles. Filling her hands with body wash, she ran them across her skin. What started as cleansing turned into something far more familiar. How many times she'd shared a hot shower with the girl whose face caused her heart to flutter. The softness of the dancers hands across tan skin. The gentle way she'd place a kiss on those muscular shoulders. The latina rolled her head back, leaning against the cold tile wall. She could feel the weight of her friend pressed against her. Her wrists pinned beside her head as the blonde trapped the brunette's full bottom lip between her two smaller ones. She could taste the cherry of Brittany's soft lips chapstick. A soft moan escaped her throat as her hands slid across the bones of her hips. They dared to venture lower, but with expert timing her phone rang, snapping her out of her reverie. Santana cursed and rinsed her hands before reaching out for a towel to dry her free hand. She checked her phone and read the message from her mother. "Papa & I are both on call tonight so we'll see you tomorrow. Just wanted to say goodnight. xoxo"

"Fantastic." she said to herself. Dropping her phone back onto the counter and rinsing off the rest of her sudsy body, she turned off the water and stepped into the steamed bathroom. Running her hand across the mirror, she caught a glimpse of herself and noticed the color had returned to her skin. She went through her nightly moisturizing routine, applying some Neosporin to her wrists and let her wet hair run down her back.

Flannel PJ pants and a 3/4 sleeved, worn baseball shirt now covered her from the cold. She rang out the moisture from her hair and tied it up into a messy bun as she stepped away from her closet and into the middle of her room. The knock on her window made her spin like a top, snapping her neck in the direction of the sound. She stepped closer to investigate the sound and saw her. The Latina swallowed hard as she stood frozen, staring at the girl. Everything in her told her not to open the window, but her heart screamed the loudest. Lowering her eyes, she undid the latch and slowly raised the glass.

"Hi." Came the soft whisper.

"What are you doing here?" It wasn't harsh.

"I needed to see you." Brittany spoke honestly.

"Why now?" the brunette asked, emotion raw her in her tone.

"Can I come in, please?" the blonde wrapped her arms tight around her body as she balanced on the tree branch. Santana felt the cold air and knew she shouldn't be cruel. She reached out her hand like she'd done so many times and felt the icy limb tremble when it touched her own. The electricity between them was palpable. Brittany stepped into the room but didn't let go of her hand. Instead, she turned it over as Quinn had done before and saw the scars for herself. Tears sprang to her eyes and she pulled the smaller girl to her, not giving her a chance to pull away. She locked her arms around the brown eyed girl and kept whispering "No", hoping that if she said it enough the scars would disappear.

Santana couldn't fight her. She didn't have the strength. So she let herself be enveloped in Brittany's arms. Arms she knew so well. She closed her eyes for just a moment, hoping to blink away the forming tears. Her tears fell the instant she felt the blonde tremble in her arms.

"You can't do that, San. Please don't do that." Brittany said between soft sobs.

Santana sniffled and pulled back from the embrace. The dancer kept her hands locked behind the brunette's head, unwilling to lose contact. "Don't worry about it." the normally feisty girl spoke lightly.

"I don't understand. Why did you do that?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time." Santana refused to meet her eyes.

"How could that seem like a good idea?" the blonde asked, irritation rising in her voice. A tone Santana had only heard a handful of times in the decade they'd known each other. Brittany wasn't a genius, but when it came to her friend, she knew everything she needed to know. At least she thought she did. She couldn't comprehend that it was her words that had lead to the torn skin of her best friend.

Santana was taken aback by her tone and cleared her throat. "I don't want to fight with you."

"Then don't fight with me. Just TALK to me!" Brittany pressed, dropping her hands to the girls shoulders.

"It hurts to talk, Britt." Santana whispered through damp eyes.

Brittany took the brunette's face in her hands and raised her chin until their eyes met. The eyes that sent hoards of butterflies through each girls chest. Eyes that contained so many unspoken words. Santana closed hers, unwilling to let herself drown in a sea of cobalt. She instinctively leaned into Brittany's touch and took a deep breath.

Slowly, like she'd only done once before, Brittany brought her lips to Santana's closed eyelid. The Latina let out a shaky breath that sounded more like a sob when the blonde repeated her kiss on the other side. The salty tears slid across Brittany's lips and she pulled back far enough to close her eyes and rest her forehead against Santana's own. "I don't want you to hurt, Santana. I'm so sorry." she breathed.

Santana fought the urge to collapse into the strong arms that felt like her second home the moment she felt the warm breath pass over her lips. She wanted nothing more than to curl up in those arms, to press her lips against the blonde's and taste the sweetness of her cherry lipbalm, to let that moment wash away the overwhelming sorrow she'd been battling for the last two weeks. Their noses touched, gentle as a whisper. Each girl slowly inching forward until there was a mere hair between their lips. They could feel the other, their breaths caught in their throats as they waited for that last heartbeat to push them forward, closing the gap. The warmth of Brittany's mouth rushed over Santana's senses and she placed her hands on the blonde's hips, pushing her back only inches as she breathed "I can't."

The air rushed out of Brittany's lungs and clenched her eyes tighter, her hands moving from Santana's face to her shoulders. "Please…" she whispered purely.

Santana had no idea where she gathered the strength, but she stepped back, her hands falling from the hips in front of her. She opened her eyes and was met with blue, filled to the brim with sadness. Brittany's hands slid down the girls shoulders to intertwine their fingers. The Latina allowed herself the touch, afraid she'd collapse without the support. She inhaled a shaky breath, "I can't, Brittany. You have absolutely no idea how much I want to, but I can't."

"Why?" the blue eye girl asked, full of confusion.

She chose her words carefully, "Because it means something more to me than it does to you right now."

"What do you mean?"

Santana released Brittany's hands, stepping past her and sitting on the edge of her bed. "You're still with Artie."

Brittany turned and stared down at her friend. "I've been with Artie for months and we've still made out."

"It's different now." The brunette lowered her head.

Brittany kneeled at the foot of the bed. "Because you told me you loved me?"

"Yeah." She whispered.

The dancer tried to make sense of it all, her brow wrinkling as she stared blankly at Santana's lap. Instinct took over the Latina and she tenderly ran her index finger between Brittany's knit brow and down the slope of her nose like she'd done countless times before. Leaning forward, she placed a gentle kiss on the blonde's forehead.

"Are your parents coming home?" Brittany asked.

"They're on call tonight."

"Can I stay with you?"

"I don't think that's a good idea, Britt." Her deep espresso eyes avoiding the sea of blue.

"I miss my friend… We don't have to make out or anything."

Santana smiled lightly and took a deep breath, "But i'd want to. And I don't know that I could stop myself again."

Brittany placed her hands on the flannel covered knees of the girl in front of her, "What if you stayed at my house? My cat can stay in the room if you want a chaperone." Santana signed. "I don't want you to be alone…" the blonde said, her eyes locked on the red lines across Santana's tender wrists.

She weighed her options. She could stay in her empty house, alone with her thoughts and replaying each one of these 7 minutes in her head until she passed out, or she could have some time alone with the person who made her heart be faster and slower at the same time. "Ok." She caved.

"Really?" Brittany's eyes sparkled with hope.

"Yeah, really. Just let me grab some stuff." She offered a smile and stood from the bed as the dancer smiled widely and pushed herself up as well.

Santana grabbed her oversized Coach bag and filled it with a pair of jeans, a sweater, clean underwear, her make-up bag, hairbrush and toothbrush. Before she stepped out of the bathroom, she instinctively put on her signature chocolate flavored lip gloss and slipped on her chucks. They walked downstairs, grabbing a jacket and were out the door, locking it, then making their way two streets over to the Pierce house.

It was dusk. The sky was a deep cerulean blue, the street lamps had clicked on and there were a handful of stars shining as they walked in silence. Neither girl wanted to risk ruining what had been a positive turn to their evening. The temperature had dropped when the sun set, proving old habits die hard as Brittany linked her arm through Santana's, her left hand in her own coat pocket, her right burrowed in the other girl's. Luckily it was a short walk.

They walked into Brittany's house, locking the front door and heading down the hall to her room. The note on her bedroom door indicated that her parents would be home around 8 and that there was food in the fridge if she was hungry. By 'food' of course, that meant pre-chopped chicken and salad since the Pierce's knew leaving Brittany alone with knives and a gas stove could potentially lead to disaster.

"Pizza?" the Blonde asked as she pulled the note off the door and discarded it in the trash can by her desk.

"Yeah, that's fine." Santana said as she sat sideways in the girl's desk chair. She dialed the familiar number, knowing Brittany was completely unsure of how to turn a computer on, let alone order online. She placed their usual order and ended the call. "Twenty minutes."

"Thanks…" The tension had risen again. Neither girl knew how to break it. Their relationship had always been so easy. Awkwardness was never an issue. Now, alone in a bedroom that had seen it's share of seriously compromising positions, their discomfort was palpable. "So… what now?" Brittany asked, an arm draped protectively across her own stomach.

"Do you wanna watch a movie or something?" Santana asked, glancing around the room.

"Not really." the blonde answered honestly. "Can we talk?"

"About what?" the brunette asked.

"You know what." Brittany's voice softened.

"There's really nothing to talk about." Santana spoke, trying desperately to avoid that particular topic.

"San…" she started, but decided not to jump right into it. "What about Sam? What's going on with you two?"

Santana sighed. "Nothing. It wasn't going to work out anyway so we just let it go."

"You broke up?"

"Yeah. Whatever. It wasn't a big deal."

"Can I ask why?" the dancer sat on the edge of her bed.

"He was all pissy about the fact that I called him 'Trouty Mouth'. Seriously. But whatev. Like I said, not a big deal." Santana crossed her legs, then her arms, feigning disinterest.

"So…then you're single?" The blonde locked eyes with the brunette for just a moment before the brown eyes darted away.

"Something like that." the Latina kept her eyes fixed on the pictures on Brittany's corkboard. Pictures from dance recitals, cheerleading competitions, sectionals, regionals, etc. She couldn't help but notice how many of the photos they were in together. Always together. In their Cheerio's uniforms making kiss faces, pinkies locked, sitting together in the back of the bus on the way to sectionals, a photo of the blonde placing a kiss on Santana's cheek. A four-framed strip from a photobooth at the mall, each picture with a different pose. Each placing a kiss on each other's cheek, making funny faces, arms wrapped tightly around each other, two halves of one whole. Brown eyes blinked away the sting of tears and smiled at the memories. Sure, there were pictures of Brittany with Artie, but they were few. Santana's presence in the blonde's life was overwhelming. She was so distracted by the pictures, she didn't notice the blue eyed girl walk up behind her. Brittany leaned over and wrapped her arms around the girls neck from behind, pressing a pale cheek against tan. The brunette signed and leaned her head back, resting it on the blonde's shoulder like she'd done countless times before.

They spent a good minute or two lost in the embrace, neither wanting to let go. "I forgot about that one." Santana spoke, pointing to the black & white photostrip.

"I didn't." Brittany whispered, her lips brushing against the Latina's tender earlobe. Santana felt a chill shoot down to her core, causing her to exhale a tiny whimper. Certainly not her loudest, but loud enough that the blonde reacted the way she always had when she'd illicit that specific sound from her friend. She smiled wickedly and took the brunette's earlobe between her teeth. The spark shot down to the brown eyed girls lady parts and she couldn't control the moan that escaped her throat.

"DANGER. STOP. DO NOT TURN AROUND. _IDEA MALA_. shit. shit. shit." Santana heard her brain screaming at her. Everything in her was telling her not to do this. Everything except her heart. "fuck it." she whispered internally and turned in the chair, grasping the blonde's face in her hands and meeting her lips. Cherry met Chocolate and both girls audibly whimpered in relief. Brittany slid her tongue across the brunette's full bottom lip, savoring the chocolatey flavor she knew so well. Santana stood from the chair, pulling the blonde up with her as they moved towards the bed. Normally, she'd push Brittany down and straddle her waist as they made out, the blonde always submitting to the fierce Latina. This time, the dancer took control and backed the brown eyed girl onto the bed, pulling the elastic out of the dark brown hair and letting the waves flow down before running her nails against the base of her scalp. Brittany knew every inch of Santana's body. What made her tick, what made her moan, what made her scream. Nails through the hair meant that a delightful moan escaped the brunette as her back landed on the bed, the weight of the blonde pressing down on her.

Santana had never been at Brittany's mercy quite like this before. Sure, there was that time in the shower, but 9 times out of 10 she had been the one in complete control. She kept trying to regain the control by keeping her hands on the blonde's face, but Brittany wouldn't allow it. The blonde pulled her hand from behind the mass of dark hair and removed the Latina's hands, pinning them down above her head. Clearly, Brittany had learned a few things from having to be on top with Artie. The mental image was erased almost as fast as it appeared when the dancer slid her tongue across the inside of Santana's top lip. Brown eyes clamped shut and her hips rose to meet the blonde's. She slid a flannel thigh between denim and both girls moaned as they received the contact they both craved desperately.

Brittany released one of Santana's wrists so she could run her hand down her side and up her shirt. Nails across the Latina's ribs meant a much louder moan, goosebumps, and a very strong writhe beneath the blonde. Their mouths finally broke apart and Brittany placed her lips against the brunette's pulse point, running her tongue across the delicate flesh, bringing her knee up as her hand pressed Santana's hips down into the bed. "God, Brittany." Yep. That always got her name spilling from those full lips. The blonde smiled and let her mouth travel lower. She lifted the hem of the brown eyed girls shirt, placing kisses across her clenching abs, running her tongue across her ribs, licking a circle around her belly button before settling her lips against the indentations of Santana's hips. "Britt, please" the brunette breathed, her hips bucking up, trying desperately to regain contact.

Brittany folded down the waistband of the flannel pajama pants and replaced her mouth an inch lower that it had been seconds before. Santana whimpered. The blonde ran her hand down the outside of the Latina's thigh, across the back of her knee, her fingers running across the inside of her thigh as she brought her hand back up. Another fold. Another inch. Moans became louder, writhing more primal. Santana's hands gripped the sheets above her head, her back arching as she silently pleaded for what Brittany knew she needed. The blonde smiled wickedly to herself and pulled herself up, straddling the brunette and pressing her hips down against the other girl. Santana began to protest but Brittany trapped her lips between her own again, letting her incredibly talented tongue work it's magic there. Every time the Latina tried to buck her hips- Brittany would press herself harder against her. The blue eyed girl broke away from Santana's lips, sitting up and leaning back slightly so she could run her hand up the inside of the brunette's thigh again. This time, she let her hand graze her destination and Santana thought she might scream. She settled for a whimper and tried to get the blonde's hand to repeat it's action. Blue eyes met brown and she let her hand retrace it's steps. Very slowly it slid up the brunette's thigh, pausing an inch from where it was needed. It slowly slid up, painfully slow.

**DING-DONG-DING-DONGGGGG**. "FUCK!" Santana groaned. The doorbell. "It's been like, 5 God damn minutes!" Brittany chuckled and moved off of the fiery girl she knew. Walking to her window, she peaked outside to see who was at the front door.

"Artie." she exhaled.

Santana sat straight up. The proverbial cold shower had arrived. Brittany turned her back to the window, facing Santana with a look of sheer panic. "He has a key." She spoke softly.

The Latina's face dropped even further and she tried to swallow the sandpaper from her throat. Neither girl knew what to do, but the second they heard the front door click Santana shot from the bed and into the blonde's closet. She slid the doors closed and peered out between the cracks, the realization of where she was finally sinking in. "Damnit, i'm never leaving this place, am I?" she muttered to herself.

There was a soft knock on the bedroom door and Brittany grabbed the headphones from her desk as she sat down, trying desperately to mask the guilt painted across her face as the door cracked open. "Brittany?" Artie asked softly, announcing himself before entering the room.

Santana knew he had a key for the same reason she did. Whenever Brittany was dancing- she tuned out the entire world. Her cell phone was discarded, music cranked loud, and the world could wait. She knew the reason, but that didn't mean she liked it.

"Hey" the blonde replied, removing her headphones and placing them back on the desk. "What are you doing here?"

"You seemed really upset this morning. We didn't get a chance to talk at lunch, and I just wanted to make sure you were ok." He may always be 'Stubbles McCripplepants', but even Santana couldn't deny that Artie cared for Brittany. She may hate the fact that he's a threat, but he was a genuinely good guy, and he had made the dancer happy. The Latina peered out through the cracks, feeling her heart constrict as the boy rolled over to the blonde and took her hand.

"I'm fine." Brittany said, looking down at their hands. The feeling of his slightly callused and certainly larger hand was such a drastic difference from the soft, gentle hand of her best friend. She was lost staring at their hands when suddenly she felt herself being tugged forward. Before she knew it, the boy kissed her, as he'd done many times before. It was sweet, he never tried to lick the back of her throat like the majority of other guys she'd been with. He was always sweet with her. Brittany had forgotten about her hidden guest and kissed her boyfriend back, placing her free hand at the back of his neck.

Santana felt the bile rise in her throat. The scars on her wrists hadn't completely healed, and they stung as fiercely as her eyes that were filling with tears. She brought her hands up over her mouth, willing herself to stay silent as she watched the girl she loved kissing someone else just feet away.

Artie pulled back and let his tongue dart out to wet his lips as they broke the kiss. "Hmm…" He muttered, confusion etching into his brow. "New lip gloss?"

"What?" Brittany asked, confused as well.

"You taste like chocolate. You usually wear cherry." Blue-green eyes bore into cobalt, not suspiciously, just honest curiosity.

Suddenly it all came back. And at that exact moment, the epic opening chords of "It's all coming back to me now" blared out from the headphones on her desk. The room was so quiet, even Santana could hear it from behind the slits in the wooden doors. "Oh. I had a chocolate shake with dinner." The blonde lied.

Artie bought it. "I like it." Brittany smiled softly & let her eyes glance toward the closet for a second, careful not to draw his attention towards the surprise guest waiting in the wings. "Well, i'm sorry to just drop in. You didn't answer your cell and I just wanted to make sure everything was ok."

"Yeah, everything's ok."

He smiled back at her, placing a gentle kiss on her lips before rolling out of the room and towards the front door. The blue eyed girl followed him, locking the door behind him and walking swiftly back to her room. She flung open the closet doors and was greeted by the tearstained cheeks of the girl she loved. Her heart sank.

"I should go." The Latina could barely get the words out, her espresso eyes fixed on the floor.

"Honey, i'm so sorry." Brittany spoke honestly and reached for the girl. Santana pulled her arms away at the touch, as if the blonde's hands were hot as fire. "Santana, please." Brittany pleaded.

"I should go." She repeated and stepped past the taller girl. She grabbed her bag and within seconds, she was gone. The blonde was frozen in her spot, staring down at the tiny puddles where Santana's tears had landed on the wood floor.


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

The clocks moved slower on Tuesday. They always seemed to, but that day especially. She didn't make eye contact. She didn't speak. She barely moved. She'd heard people say that they felt as if the weight of the world was on their chest. She'd tried her hardest, but never quite understood the expression. How could someone breathe if the world was on top of them? But today, she finally understood. Brittany never saw her best friend. The girl didn't show up to class, she missed lunch, and by 2:45PM the blonde assumed she'd miss Glee club as well. She turned the corner into the room and saw her.

Santana sat next to Brad, the pianist, speaking softly and pointing to the sheet music propped against the piano. Brittany froze in the doorway, only to be gently prodded forward when Finn placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. She met his gaze and he gave her a soft smile before leading them over to the chairs.

As Mr. Shue walked in, the Latina stood and sat in the chair farthest from the blonde. Brittany felt her heart drop again. He'd just started to bring up their assignment for the week when Santana stopped him. "Mr. Schuester, before you tell us was we're going to have to do this week, would you mind if I sang something i've been working on?" Will wasn't used to a straightforward question from the girl and simply nodded, realizing it must be important if her token snarkiness had been cast aside.

Santana took a seat beside Brad as he began to play the gentle intro.

_Here we are. Isn't it familiar? _

_Haven't had someone to talk to in such a long time_

_And it's strange, all we have in common_

_And your company was just the thing I needed tonight._

Santana's voice was tender, but it dripped with raw emotion as she stared straight ahead, catching the fall of Brittany's chest as she exhaled her last breath out of the corner of her eye.

_Somehow I feel I should apologize._

_'Cause I'm just a little shaken by what's going on inside._

She turned her head slowly, mahogany meeting cobalt as she sang the words that she'd spoken the night before.

_I should go, before my will gets any weaker_

_and my eyes begin to linger longer than they should_

_I should go, before I lose my sense of reason_

_and this hour holds more meaning than it ever could _

_I should go. I should go. Baby, I should go._

Santana felt her throat tighten as she locked eyes with the blonde. Her own eyes filling with tears as a single tear passed between sandy blonde lashes. She swallowed the growing lump in her throat and continued.

_It's so hard keeping my composure_

_I pretend I don't see how your body curves beneath your clothes_

They never looked away. As if no one else was in the room, the brunette sang every word straight into Brittany's soul. Recalling the lyrics that came next, a smile fell from those full lips.

_and your laugh is pure and unaffected._

_It frightens me to know so well the place I shouldn't go_

_But I know I gotta take the nobel path_

_'cause I don't want you to question the intentions that I have._

Those who knew what was unfolding before them shared stolen glances. Those unaware felt the slight pangs of awkwardness, but began to put the pieces together with each passing word.

_I should go, before my will gets any weaker_

_and my eyes begin to linger longer than they should._

_I should go, before I lose my sense of reason_

_and this hour holds more meaning than it ever could._

_I should go. I should go. Baby, I should go._

Santana stood as she reached the bridge. Not for an added touch of drama. Not for the performance. Just because the emotions she felt wouldn't allow her to sit still any longer. She took a step forward, her eyes never leaving their tearstained companion's.

_Now I don't mean to leave you with a trivial excuse_

_and when you call tomorrow, I'll know what to do._

She glanced down, composing herself before she continued, and noticed the detail she'd missed this entire time: Brittany's hands were not free. One was covered by another, a hand not as delicate. One often adorning a fingerless glove. She raised her eyes and met the blue-green orbs behind black rimmed glasses. She felt as if she was raising a white flag. Her voice broke and she nearly sobbed the last chorus.

_I should go, before my will gets any weaker_

_and my eyes begin to linger longer than they should_

_I should go, before I lose my sense of reason_

_and this hour holds more meaning than it ever could_

_I should go. I should go. Baby, I should go._

_I should go, baby. I should go._

_I should go._

Brad hit his final chord and let it ring out. Santana had dropped her eyes to the floor as she sang the last words, her tears falling without reservation. The room was silent for what seemed like the full hour, when in reality it had only been seconds before the sounds of sniffles echoed through the acoustic room.

"Wow. Thank you, Santana. That was stunning." Mr. Schue spoke softly and placed a tender hand on her shoulder. She raised her damp eyes to his and nodded before turning to Brad to nod a 'Thank you' in his direction, discreetly wiping her face. She walked back to her seat, ignoring the looks from everyone around her. Even with her eyes cast downward, she could see that the blonde hadn't dislodged her stare from the spot where she'd just stood. Santana felt the soft, warm fingers lace between her own and didn't pull away. She simply gave the green eyed girl's hand a gentle squeeze and kept their hands locked together, needing the added support.

"Well, I don't know how anyone could follow that, so let's just jump right into our lesson today. Nationals. It's only a couple weeks away. While yes, we've decided on doing original songs, we need to put together our best pairing for the duet. So. I've taken all of your names and i've placed them in this hat."

"Mr. Schuester, I'm sure you're aware that we have an uneven amount of members in our Glee club. What about the extra name?" Always a question from one, Miss Rachel Berry.

"Whoever's name remains can either join the duo of their choice, or they can opt out of having a lead in the duet." The rest of the club nodded and Will shuffled the paper in the hat. "Alright, first up is…" He reached in an pulled out a piece of paper. "Sam." He reached in again, pulling out a second piece. "And… Artie." The boys gave each other a look and nodded approvingly. Will repeated the drawing, pairing Mercedes and Kurt, Mike and Lauren, Tina and Puck. The remaining names were swirled around before the he drew again.

"Next up… Quinn and…" Paused as he pulled the name and wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. "Rachel." Both girls turned their eyes to each other and before they could begin their arguing he shushed them and continued. "Last pairing! Brittany and… Santana." He said the latina's name slowly, offering her a look of genuine concern as he watched her swallow hard and close her eyes. Brittany looked up at him, finally raising her gaze for the first time since Santana finished her song. "That just leaves Finn. What's your choice, buddy?"

Rachel and Quinn both shot him looks and he ignored them both. He considered joining the other female Blonde & Brunette pairing, but decided they needed their Brittana time alone. "You know, I think i'm gonna sit this one out." Finn said confidently.

"That's it then. Now, to make this just a bit more interesting, we're also going to draw songs." The entire room groaned. "Oh come on, It'll get you to work outside of your comfort zone. Not all of these songs are originally duets either. Some of you are going to have to get creative."

He placed another group of papers into the hat and shook them around. Songs ranged from "The Lazy Song" by Bruno Mars, to "How to Save a Life" by the Fray. "Next, Rachel and Quinn, you two will be singing… 'Just a Kiss' by Lady Antebellum." Will said, crumbling the paper and reaching for the last slip in the hat while the bickering girls continued their rants. "Which means… Brittany and Santana, you will be singing 'Water Runs Dry' by Boyz 2 Men."

Both girls nodded numbly. "Now I want you guys to get creative. Maybe put a different spin on the song you have. Feel free to go through youtube, maybe find a different arrangement. Get some ideas."

Though the remainder of the hour seemed to drag on, it was all a blur. When the final bell rang, Santana was first out the door, leaving a still stunned Brittany watching her fly out of the room. Everyone else made their way out into the hall, but the blonde was moving a bit slower than usual. As she stepped towards the exit her line of sight was distorted. Where her feet met the tile she now saw the blinking red and green lights.

"What's going on with you and Santana?" His voice wasn't angry. It was hard to tell if Artie Abrams ever truly got angry. He was soft spoken and kind every time he spoke to the girl before him.

"Nothing." Brittany shook her head lightly.

"Then what was that song about?"

"It's really nothing, Artie. I gotta go." She tried to step around him but he blocked her path.

"Brittany, i'm not an idiot. Something's going on and I just want you to be honest with me." He reached for her hand.

"I'm sorry." She spoke honestly and was out the door before he had a chance to call her name.

* * *

><p>"We really should discuss this." The petite brunette began.<p>

"We really shouldn't." Green eyes clamping shut.

"But Qui-"

"Rachel, you take the guy's part, i'll take the girl's. Simple." Quinn said as she closed her locker door.

"Shouldn't we at least-" Rachel couldn't get the sentence out before she felt herself tugged around a corner, her thoughts interrupted by Quinn's body pressed against hers.

"Rachel, I'm begging you," the blonde said softly, their faces only inches apart, trying to avoid any stray students from hearing their conversation. "let's just make this easy."

The doe eyed girl swallowed hard and tried to get her thoughts organized. "W-we should at least run through it together." Her voice was shaky, her nerves evident.

Quinn exhaled and felt her resolve start to crumble. "I'll meet you at your house at 6:30." and with that she was gone.

Rachel immediately felt the cold air conditioning hit her skin. Her body buzzed with excitement, knowing she would get to spend the evening with the former cheerleader. Their bickering only caused the sexual tension between them to thicken. Locked in a basement, singing together would be just the thing she needed to inspire her to write an amazing song for nationals.

* * *

><p>"Can we talk?" It was almost a whisper.<p>

"About what?" Santana always did have a knack for avoiding.

"You know what."

"Do I?"

Brittany sighed and watched the Latina root through her locker, avoiding eye contact. She grasped Santana's hand and locked their fingers together so she couldn't pull away again. "Please don't pull away from me."

Santana looked down at their hands and tried to keep her emotions in check.

"Can we talk about last night?"

"What about it?" It wasn't mean, just heavy with conflicting emotions.

"I'm sorry." Brittany said, her eyes finally meeting the deep brown of the brunettes. "I'm so sorry."

Santana sighed, never one to enjoy seeing the blonde upset. "It's fine, Britt, Don't worry about it."

"It's not fine. You were crying."

"It's not a big de-" The Latina was interrupted by a forceful, slender finger across her lips.

"Will you stop? God, San. It IS a big deal! This is a REALLY big deal." The dancer rarely got verbally frustrated with anyone. "I don't know what to do."

Santana's eyes mirrored the sadness in Brittany's own. She closed her locker and placed her other hand over their already locked fingers.

"I don't want to hurt anybody." A tear fell from the pools of blue and crashed onto the cotton stretched across her aching chest. Santana reached up and brushed the trail of moisture from the pale cheek before her.

"I know you don't." she whispered. Reluctantly, Santana removed her hand from the girls cheek and cleared her throat. "Can we just work on our song tonight? We don't have to do anything else."

Brittany sniffled and the corners of her mouth turned up into a small smile. "Yeah. Sounds good."

The girls released each others hands, but instinctively locked pinkies as they walked down the hall towards the parking lot.

Neither girl had noticed the boy watching them from the doorway.

* * *

><p>Rachel finished tidying the large basement-turned-performance space. She straightened out the hem of her low cut, loose fitting v-neck t-shirt and adjusted her jeans. It was rare that Rachel Berry dressed down in jeans and a t-shirt, but she'd noticed the way Quinn had looked at her the last time she wore jeans to perform and felt that rehearsal time was a reasonable excuse. She heard the doorbell ring and sprinted up the stairs, taking a moment to calm herself and brush down her hair at the hall mirror before taking a deep breath and opening the door.<p>

"Good evening, Quinn." she spoke, placing a hand on her hip.

"Hi." The blonde breathed out, trying desperately not to stare at the revealed, tan flesh of Rachel's chest.

Rachel noticed her failed attempt and smiled inwardly to herself before ushering the girl inside and leading her down to the basement. They'd been down there together before, however this time they weren't accompanied by the rest of the Glee club, or the copious amount of alcohol.

"Hmm. Looks different than I remember it. Then again, I don't really remember much about that night." The green eyed girl spoke honestly as they reached the bottom of the steps.

"Yeah, I think that's probably best for everyone." Rachel offered the girl a smile and stepped over to the bar. "Can I offer you something not quite as inebriating?"

Quinn sat at the bar stool and placed her bag on the bar. "Water is fine."

The brunette offered her a bottle of Fiji water and took a seat beside her. "I brought down my laptop so we could go through some youtube videos of the song." she said, opening her Mac Book Pro and pulling up a live performance.

Quinn took a sip of the water, letting it relieve the tightening muscles of her throat as the song began. The song was simple enough. Sweet and melodic, with just the right amount of honesty. The blonde knew the song well, having spent many a car ride blasting it and singing along at the top of her lungs. "Should we have Brad play it for us?" She asked.

Rachel lowered the volume slightly and cast a glance in the taller girls direction. "Actually, i've been tinkering around with it on the piano. I thought maybe I could try to play it for us." she spoke shyly. It was incredibly rare that Rachel Berry let herself appear insecure about anything musical. If it were anyone else, she'd normally demand the opportunity and appear as confident as ever. She couldn't bear the thought of embarrassing herself in front of the former cheerleader.

"Oh. I didn't know you played." The blonde said.

"I'm not amazing at it, but I think I can hold my own. Can I play it for you?"

"Yeah, of course." Quinn followed the smaller girl to the Piano and leaned against it as she watched Rachel take a seat and place her lithe fingers on the keys. The melody began and the blonde swallowed hard.

_Lying here with you so close to me_

_it's hard to fight this feeling when it feels so hard to breathe._

_i'm caught up in this moment, caught up in your smile._

Rachel couldn't help but smile as she heard the girl begin to sing. She was so caught up she nearly missed her own entrance.

_I've never opened up to anyone_

_So hard to hold back when i'm holding you in my arms_

The girls locked eyes as they sang the lyrics together.

_But we don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow._

Quinn sat down on the bench beside the brunette as they began the chorus.

_Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight._

_Just a touch of the fire burning so bright._

_I don't wanna mess this thing up._

_No, I don't wanna push too far._

_Just a shot in the dark that you just might_

_be the one i've been waiting for my whole life._

_So baby, i'm alright with just a kiss good night._

The girls looked away from each other, trying to keep themselves under control as they continued the song.

_I know that if we give this a little time_

_it'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find_

_it's never felt so real, _

_no, it's never felt so right._

_Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight._

_Just a touch of the fire burning so bright._

_I don't wanna mess this thing up._

_No, I don't wanna push too far._

_Just a shot in the dark that you just might_

_be the one i've been waiting for my whole life._

_So baby, i'm alright with just a kiss good night._

Despite the fact that they were seated, their bodies moved with the music. They shared the same rise and fall, inching closer to each other as they reached the bridge. Their shoulders touched as they sang the duet.

_No I don't wanna say 'good night_'

_I know it's time to leave_

Their eyes met and Quinn's hand moved to the small of Rachel's back.

_but you'll be in my dreams_

Rachel's throat constricted as she felt the warmth of Quinn's hand. She barely choked out the lyrics.

_tonight_

Quinn echoed the word and she too had inhaled a shaky breath.

_tonight_

Both girls closed their eyes as the bridge ended and lead them into the chorus.

_tonight._

_Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight._

_Just a touch of the fire burning so bright._

_I don't wanna mess this thing up._

_No, I don't wanna push too far._

_Just a shot in the dark that you just might_

_be the one i've been waiting for my whole life._

_So baby, i'm alright._

Quinn reached up and brushed a lock of hair behind Rachel's ear as they neared the end of the song.

_Oh, let's do this right_

_with just a kiss good night._

_with a kiss good night_

Rachel hit the last chord, their voices blending perfectly before fading out. Their eyes stayed locked, neither girl sure of what to do, just sure they didn't want the moment to end. They didn't realize they were leaning forward until their lips touched. Eyes slid shut and both girls released an audible exhalation of relief, as if they'd waited for that moment their entire lives. The kiss wasn't very long. It didn't need to be. Quinn was sure she felt her heart beating faster and slower at the same time. Rachel could hear the blood rushing through her ears. It felt like hours without air when it had merely been seconds. They broke away and their eyes fluttered open. Neither one quite sure how to react. Their chests rose and fell in perfect sync. Rachel looked into the sea of green before her and ignored the voice in her head screaming for her to wait. She placed her petite hands on the sides of the blonde's face and pulled her in for another kiss.

The second kiss was different. Fierce. They were both aware that everything was different now. They could never go back, but they weren't sure they wanted to. Quinn's hands gently stroked Rachel's back through the thin material of her t-shirt. Her lips parted and she noticed that the brunette tasted like vanilla. Quinn loved vanilla. She could feel herself losing control but didn't care. She slid her hand underneath the softness of the doe eyed girl's shirt, relishing the heat she felt radiating off her skin.

Rachel couldn't suppress the moan that escaped her throat when she felt her tongue connect with the velvet sweetness of Quinn's. The green eyed girl tasted of cinnamon and the brunette felt herself becoming lightheaded. She knew if they broke their embrace now they might not ever come back to it. She didn't want to risk it, so she tangled her fingers in the blonde locks, willing their bodies as close as they could get.

The piano bench was hardly comfortable. Quinn didn't want to pull away, but knew they needed to move. In a swift move she could only credit to years of Cheerio's training, the blonde wrapped the brunette's legs around her own waist and slid them from the bench, lowering them to the floor carefully. Rachel had no idea how it happened, but she didn't complain. She couldn't form a complaint if she tried. Their bodies pressed against each other on the floor and both girls whimpered at the contact. Rachel untangled her fingers from the blonde tresses and ran her hands down Quinn's side. She could feel the heat enveloping her and for the first time that night, realized that the blonde was wearing a skirt. Her hands grasped at the blonde's hips and pulled them closer.

Rachel softly moaned the former cheerleader's name as their lips parted for a split second. Quinn sat up and straddled the the smaller girl. Her lips moved to the brunette's collarbone and focused their attention there. She could feel the singer writhing under her and her hand moved to the button of Rachel's jeans. She undid the button with ease and slid the zipper down, her hand brushing against her desired location, causing Rachel to moan her name louder.

The brown eyed girl slid her hands down Quinn's thighs, her nails causing goosebumps in their trail. The blonde was about to slide her hand under the denim when she hear her own voice. "God, Rachel" she heard herself moan. The desire in her voice terrified her and she pulled away. Looking down at the girl under her, green eyes filled with tears and she covered her mouth. "Oh my God."

Rachel sat up, still pinned below the waist. "Are you ok?" She asked, genuinely concerned.

"I…what are we…I'm… Oh my God, Rachel. I'm sorry." The blonde stood and turned her back to the smaller girl.

The brunette sat up fully, finally noticing the disarray of her jeans. She stood and re-buttoned the denim, not bothering to adjust her shirt as she placed a hand on the blonde's shoulder. "hey" she spoke softly.

"I'm so sorry, Rachel. I gotta go." Quinn apologized and ran up the stairs, leaving a trail of tears behind her. The doe eyed girl raised her hand to her lips, still feeling the buzz from the electricity between them. She licked her lips and tasted cinnamon. A small smile graced her swollen lips and she collapsed on the plush couch, memories of the last 15 minutes replaying in her mind.


End file.
